I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
