wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
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so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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