Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
