Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
