actually, I'm a sock model
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
