He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize