Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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