He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Someone came in the potted fern
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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