I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
