i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
