god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
