I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
True strength comes from lack of pants
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
