You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
