she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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