you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
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