I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
