Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport http://tfl.nu/5bf4
  Replies (40) Good night (4068) Bad night (578)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am. http://tfl.nu/rcus
  Replies (11) Good night (3883) Bad night (575)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other. http://tfl.nu/nigv
  Replies (29) Good night (6940) Bad night (1617)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see. http://tfl.nu/uq0v
  Replies (11) Good night (2348) Bad night (1154)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.

  (1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

  What did you cook with whisky?

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  We started a fire.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (306): We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky. (1-306): What did you cook with whisky? (306): We started a fire. http://tfl.nu/4y3v
  Replies (11) Good night (6093) Bad night (1246)
• Favorite

  (340): View more from US Virgin Islands

  I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (340): I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting.. http://tfl.nu/wypp
  Replies (4) Good night (2152) Bad night (758)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know. http://tfl.nu/c5k4
  Replies (11) Good night (2186) Bad night (479)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears http://tfl.nu/wgjj
  Replies (15) Good night (855) Bad night (1633)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good http://tfl.nu/2hdv
  Replies (8) Good night (2030) Bad night (472)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above. http://tfl.nu/ffte
  Replies (2) Good night (950) Bad night (274)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget. http://tfl.nu/wj00
  Replies (6) Good night (314) Bad night (528)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with http://tfl.nu/msu7
  Replies (0) Good night (408) Bad night (466)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop http://tfl.nu/0zhw
  Replies (1) Good night (483) Bad night (289)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie. http://tfl.nu/fnuq
  Replies (9) Good night (515) Bad night (443)
• Favorite

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (808): In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it. http://tfl.nu/3ucc
  Replies (4) Good night (284) Bad night (342)

Randomize