And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
