You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
my vag is so smooth its legendary
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
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Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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