So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I am puke
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
