so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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