How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
How external is "for external use only"?
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
