there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
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