Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
