sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
