you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
