Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
two words...techno handjob
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
