So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
