She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
