All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Randomize
