Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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