if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
please come you make the beer taste better
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
