Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
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