After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize