I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Randomize
