So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
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i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
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So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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