Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
it's great music for shaving your balls
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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