Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
