I feel like abortions should bother me more
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
