Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
