Texts From Last Night

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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet

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  (770): Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet http://tfl.nu/7ieb
  Replies (58) Good night (882) Bad night (19715)
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  (707): View more from California

  I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever

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  (707): I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever http://tfl.nu/38jn
  Replies (51) Good night (6507) Bad night (711)
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs

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  (641): literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs http://tfl.nu/fh11
  Replies (17) Good night (4548) Bad night (736)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm

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  (303): I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm http://tfl.nu/jf8q
  Replies (16) Good night (690) Bad night (4888)
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  (514): View more from Quebec

  He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.

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  (514): He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period. http://tfl.nu/yw8j
  Replies (18) Good night (628) Bad night (4658)
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  (909): View more from California

  Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...

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  (909): Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups... http://tfl.nu/mcei
  Replies (5) Good night (2994) Bad night (1322)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos

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  (617): the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos http://tfl.nu/3hab
  Replies (11) Good night (3705) Bad night (832)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.

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  (978): I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver. http://tfl.nu/zig6
  Replies (6) Good night (1131) Bad night (2228)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.

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  (330): I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse. http://tfl.nu/kxn7
  Replies (2) Good night (1951) Bad night (798)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.

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  (507): It's a special occasion. Hence the 151. http://tfl.nu/vp1j
  Replies (5) Good night (1905) Bad night (826)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I think they're German

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Just say lederhosen and see what happens

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  (513): I think they're German (203): Just say lederhosen and see what happens http://tfl.nu/u5tp
  Replies (8) Good night (1494) Bad night (564)
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  (310): View more from California

  My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.

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  (310): My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever. http://tfl.nu/d22o
  Replies (6) Good night (3421) Bad night (512)
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  (949): View more from California

  When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless

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  (949): When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless http://tfl.nu/xa8r
  Replies (7) Good night (1277) Bad night (639)
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  (707): View more from California

  I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?

  (650): View more from California

  There is so much wrong with that sentence

  (707): View more from California

  Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real

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  (707): I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom? (650): There is so much wrong with that sentence (707): Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real http://tfl.nu/wzrt
  Replies (5) Good night (1029) Bad night (503)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party

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  (402): In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party http://tfl.nu/gnzr
  Replies (1) Good night (354) Bad night (185)

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