She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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