Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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