the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
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I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
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