ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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