I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Randomize
