I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
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