so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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