Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
