Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize