Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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