I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize